Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Laughing in the Face of the Devil
"The Supreme Court confirmation hearings are under way for Judge Sam Alito. Democrats want to know his position on privacy. Republicans want to know his position on prison terms for bribery."---Jay Leno
-
"According to the Washington Post, Vice President Dick Cheney is limping today because he injured his foot. Cheney said, 'If you think my foot looks bad, you should see the old lady I was kicking.'"---Conan O'Brien
-
"You know how sometimes during war time, civil liberties can take a back seat to national security? Well, I got good news and bad news. The good news is this: no Japanese people are being sent to any camps. The bad news is: that time you got hammered and drunk-dialed your ex-girlfriend who's studying abroad and sang her that WHAM! song that was 'your song?' The government's got that on tape."---Jon Stewart
-
"Indicted congressman Tom Delay has announced he is resigning as House Majority Leader. However, he's still going to run for re-election. So apparently he feels he is too corrupt to be a leader but not too corrupt to be just a congressman."---Jay Leno
-
"Congressmen are actually now returning illegal gifts. I called the weather bureau and, sure enough, hell has frozen over."---David Letterman
-
"According to the Washington Post, Vice President Dick Cheney is limping today because he injured his foot. Cheney said, 'If you think my foot looks bad, you should see the old lady I was kicking.'"---Conan O'Brien
-
"You know how sometimes during war time, civil liberties can take a back seat to national security? Well, I got good news and bad news. The good news is this: no Japanese people are being sent to any camps. The bad news is: that time you got hammered and drunk-dialed your ex-girlfriend who's studying abroad and sang her that WHAM! song that was 'your song?' The government's got that on tape."---Jon Stewart
-
"Indicted congressman Tom Delay has announced he is resigning as House Majority Leader. However, he's still going to run for re-election. So apparently he feels he is too corrupt to be a leader but not too corrupt to be just a congressman."---Jay Leno
-
"Congressmen are actually now returning illegal gifts. I called the weather bureau and, sure enough, hell has frozen over."---David Letterman
